This morning I heard the boys playing so well in the living room. They each had their trains and were "chooching" (as Stephen puts it) around the lines on the rug. All of a sudden I started to hear some undertones of complaining. The griping got louder and louder until I heard Stephen announce so emphatically at Timothy, "If you don't move your train then I am NOT going to be your friend anymore!" To which Timothy replied in a voice just as loud and emphatic, " I don't care because I'm not going to be your friend first!" I chose to let this moment go uninterrupted by Mom because, honestly, I was trying not to laugh! I figured they could work this one out on their own.
Unfortunately, they didn't work it out on their own, so I ended up going over to find out what the problem really was. Timothy had just sat down with a thump on the floor and said, "I'm not going to talk to him now." I took that as a teachable moment and told them that Timothy was choosing the right action because Grandma always told us that it takes two to fight. If Timothy was not going to fight back, then there really was no one for Stephen to fight with because it would be silly for Stephen to try to fight with himself. This cracked Stephen up and within seconds they were both laughing and "chooching" on their way again.
I know that we were like this as kids, too. I just don't remember it all. One minute these guys are the best of friends; holding hands, telling each other that they love them, encouraging each other, and then within mere seconds, I see arms flinging out with a whack or hair being pulled or a tower being knocked down on purpose. I try not to get frustrated with the fact that one successful occassion does not mean that sibling problems are solved for a lifetime, but I AM encouraged when I hear more of the positive comments and peaceful playing going on. Maybe we ARE doing something right as parents after all!
The boys did end on a good note this morning when we were waiting for Stephen's bus. It was cold, so Stephen asked Timothy if he could come hug him to keep him warm. And Timothy just asked me how much longer until Stephen comes home from school. They DO still love each other! Hurray!!
3 comments:
Amazingly, teenagers keep the same pace in their relationships. (Why did I think maturation went faster?) It is still fun to hear them make each other laugh, though. I'm pretty sure that will last for a while.
Actually, this whole process lasts a lifetime in one way or another. Enjoy them now, they grow up too fast. (Then you look at them and wonder where they got all their knowledge, etc. and did YOU actually contribute to their education!) Thank the Lord for these little lessons in life
I just noticed that the picture contains chocolate SMARTIES! No fair! I want some!
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